April 2017

 We have a new logo! 

A special thank you to Chelsae Carlson, Design and Marketing Specialist at PATH, for creating a logo unique to ND Post Adopt Network.  We hope to become recognized as a service providing for all adoptive families, regardless of the type of adoption.

We have five senses – sight, smell, sound, taste and touch.  Each one of them is really important in our everyday life. Your senses work together to let your brain know what is going on around you. When children are matched with their forever family, it is an exciting time! But this can also be a scary endeavor with all of the unknowns and changes. There will be different smells, different tastes, different surroundings, different schedules, different family, a different bed, a different pillow, different everything! We can help our children transition into their forever families by trying to maintain the same senses they have experienced. How can you make this transition easier for your children? I’m glad you asked!

Smell: Have you ever come across a scent that reminds you of someone? You could use the same kind of laundry detergent your child’s previous foster family used to help your child feel more comfortable. If your child is young and has not transitioned into your home yet, perhaps you can sleep with a blanket or a pillow case for a week to get your ‘scent’ on it, and then give it to your child to sleep with to help them get accustomed to your scent. I once told my dad that he smells like home and safety. He thought I was strange, but regardless, his smell still comforts me. (He will be so embarrassed when he reads this)

Taste: Ask your child what their favorite foods are and how the food is prepared (or ask the previous foster family). Their favorite food might be hamburgers, but how well done is the meat? Were the hamburger buns homemade or a certain brand from the store? Does your child like to squirt the ketchup in the style of a happy face on their hamburger before they eat it? This may seem trivial to us, but this could mean a lot to your child. My niece Emma is a great example as she dislikes everybody’s mashed potatoes, except she LOVES my mom’s mashed potatoes. Therefore my mom prepares mashed potatoes for Emma every time she is at their house and Emma feels special that grandma made it specifically for her. (My mom’s secret? She adds milk :))

Sight: Does your child like a nightlight in their bedroom? Simple accommodations could help your child feel more safe and secure. Does your child have a past that involves food not being accessible to them? Perhaps your child is worried about not having enough food or worried about their next meal? I expect adoptive families to work closely with their adoption worker and your child’s therapist about these fears, but perhaps it could be a simple solution such as showing your child where the granola bars are stored and ensure they are easily accessible to your child. Maybe have a bowl of different fruit options on the kitchen counter that your child can take from at any time. Giving your child the visual reassurance that food is always available to them may help calm their mind. Again, please consult with your child’s therapist and adoption worker if this is a concern.

Sound: Does your child like to have a fan on at night? Does it help your child fall sleep if they listen to the radio or do they like complete silence while they sleep? Ask your kiddo or ask their previous foster parents. Does your child like to listen to music when they are upset or when they need time to be alone? Ensure they have access to their favorite music when they need it.

Touch: Does your child have a favorite blanket or a favorite stuffed animal? Make sure these items are with your child when they transition into their adoptive home. Does your child like to get their back rubbed while they are falling asleep? Does your child feel uncomfortable with hugs? Wonderful questions to ask your child.

There are countless more options that we can do to help our children with the transition into their forever home. Please talk to your adoption worker for more ideas!

Also, be sure to “like” ND Post Adopt Support on Facebook. We are getting close to 200 followers and once we hit that, everyone will be in a drawing for PATH and AASK gear! 🙂

Have a great week!

As you can see from our main home page on the website, our mission statement is: “To maintain and enhance adoptive families well-being by providing a network of supportive and responsive resources.” While that sounds all good and “social work like”, I do want to break this down a little.

Parenting is hard, regardless of how your children were added to your family. If your children were added to your family through adoption, you know very well that there are specific adoption issues that come along with it.  Past traumas, maintaining relationships with birth families, mental health concerns, navigating community providers, and helping your kids explain how they became part of your family are just a few of the many additional things that may continually float in the back of your mind.

ND Post Adopt Support was created to focus attention on your specific needs as an adoptive family. If you are struggling and need a place to vent, someone to help you navigate community resources, help in brainstorming what to do first, someone to advocate for your child in the school system, that’s what we are here for. The best part about this is that our support is not limited to cookie-cutter systems, but we can help you with what you need.

It is common that adoptive families face unique challenges in parenting as their children hit different developmental stages that may require ongoing services/supports. We believe that families should have early access to these services to prevent disruption and minimize conflict in your home.  So please reach out! As we continue to move forward with building this service, we look forward to putting support groups in place throughout the state, as well as online support groups and trainings so you can still attend from the comfort of your own home.  We will have mentor families available to help you through difficult situations. We will have a database of services available in your area.

As the Post Adopt Coordinator, I am based out of the PATH office in Fargo. I do cover the whole state and expect to travel, so please give me a call! We also welcome ANY ideas and suggestions as we continue to develop this very exciting service.  As always, feel free to leave any comments below 🙂

Happy Monday!

Sonja

P.S. Be sure to find us and “like” us on Facebook at: https://www.facebook.com/ndpostadopt or by searching ND Post Adopt Support. Contests for PATH gear will soon be held for all who are part of our FB family.